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Twas the month after Christmas

sandysford Posts: 1,139 Joined: 2002/11/18	2004/01/08, 12:10 AM Twas the Month after Christmas Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house, Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse. The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste, At the holiday parties had gone to my waist. When I got on the scales there arose such a number! When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber). I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared, The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared. The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese, And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please." As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt, And prepared once again to do battle with dirt. I said to myself, as I only can, "You can't spend a winter disguised as a man!" So--away with the last of the sour cream dip, Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip. Every last bit of food that I like must be banished, 'Till all the additional ounces have vanished. I won't have a cookie--not even a lick, I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick. I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie, I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry. I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore, But isn't that what January is for? Unable to giggle, no longer a riot, Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet! -------------- THE NATURAL WAY IS THE ONLY TRUE PATH TO SUCCESS, PRIDE, JOY, HAPPINESS, LONG TERM FULFILLMENT AND SELF-ESTEEM!
I_Am-aZon Posts: 893 Joined: 2003/02/18	2004/01/08, 02:33 PM LOL Now that is probably too close to the truth in many instances! Good one Sandy
Jdelts Posts: 1,218 Joined: 2003/10/19	2004/01/08, 03:05 PM Dear god, you are a genius Sandysford. You hit the nail on the head. I love crappy food and I will miss it as well. -------------- May the lift be with you.
gretchb73 Posts: 36 Joined: 2003/08/20	2004/01/09, 02:18 PM That is the best poem ever!! Oh my how the truth hurts :) Good one!! I would laugh harder, but hate to feel my belly jiggle.
asimmer Posts: 8,201 Joined: 2003/01/07	2004/01/12, 04:17 PM How did you know I am wearing my husbands shirt????
Diana123 Posts: 135 Joined: 2003/02/03	2004/01/13, 01:11 PM Lol!!!WOW, nice poem. Exactly how I feel too. Although the scale went "only" up by 3 pounds, I feel bad because I kept my weight all year and in a few days gained three pounds. Oh well, had some cabbage soup for dinner...not that bad. Supposed to help lose weight...hmm,why do I feel hungry?? Well,good luck on the diet and will be suffering with ya.(although some low-fat recipes for cornbread,and even cookies exist...).....noooo cookies.....
Diana123 Posts: 135 Joined: 2003/02/03	2004/01/13, 01:11 PM Lol!!!WOW, nice poem. Exactly how I feel too. Although the scale went "only" up by 3 pounds, I feel bad because I kept my weight all year and in a few days gained three pounds. Oh well, had some cabbage soup for dinner...not that bad. Supposed to help lose weight...hmm,why do I feel hungry?? Well,good luck on the diet and will be suffering with ya.(although some low-fat recipes for cornbread,and even cookies exist...).....noooo cookies.....