Group: All Else Lounge

Created: 2011/12/31, Members: 42, Messages: 22740

This is the place you can discuss anything else that is on your mind that isn't already covered by other groups. Share what's on your mind and see who else has something to say about it!

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sleeping around

effalunt
effalunt
Posts: 333
Joined: 2002/10/17
Canada
2002/12/11, 02:06 AM
You know, I'm a little tired of being labelled as a 'prude' because I don't sleep around. It seems that most people I meet judge me based on the fact that I won't go home with someone I don't know. The way I see it, why would I put so much effort into improving my body, and then let just anybody see me naked? If I have to work this hard to look good, I'd like a little committment! Sometimes I feel like a minority because I like to know someone as a person first. I've been finding that the more in shape I get, the more it's expected that I'm easy! I'd don't want to be assigned any type of label, I just want to find someone who respects me as much as I respect myself. Just needed to get this off my mind, if anyone has any thoughts, that'd be great. -this is not a complaint against men, just society in general-

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Think you can or think you can't; either way you're right--Goethe
7707mutt
7707mutt
Posts: 7,686
Joined: 2002/06/18
United States
2002/12/11, 10:59 AM
Well I am not a prude by anymeans, and I waited till I met my wife and knew she was the One before I had sex at all. I know that sounds funny, corny or lame, but I am bulit (mentally) different than most and I wanted to save it for someon that meant something. I am glad I did. It was worth it by far. So I say good for you!

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IF THE SWEAT AIN'T IN YOUR EYES, AND IT AIN'T STINGING, THEN YOU AIN'T LIFTIN!
Carivan
Carivan
Posts: 8,542
Joined: 2002/01/20
Canada
2002/12/11, 04:47 PM
You are you own ruler.
The girls that sleep around are not respected in the end anyway! (Men also for that matter)
My dad used to tell me "if she slept with you so easy, what about thier past"?

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The trouble with jogging is that, by the time you realize you are not in shape for it, it is too far to walk back! Franklin P. Jones

Ivan Montreal Canada
Philia2
Philia2
Posts: 4,078
Joined: 2001/10/19
France
2002/12/12, 03:48 AM
"I've been finding that the more in shape I get, the more it's expected that I'm easy! "

That's the first time I've heard that..... I should say that it's more about the way that you dress than the fact of being in good shape.....

Yes men can be quite silly (I'm sorry guys!! ;o) when they try to get in contact with a young lovely woman but don't you care about them. YOU are the one who decide what YOU want to do. Just go with your feelings.

For me today it's quite easy lol I just tell them that I'm married and they go away!!! (o;

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- Nina :o) Les Victoires éternelles sont celles du coeur.
effalunt
effalunt
Posts: 333
Joined: 2002/10/17
Canada
2002/12/12, 11:14 AM
I don't generally even wear tight, short, or low cut clothes. I think it's just the way things are these days.

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Think you can or think you can't; either way you're right--Goethe
Sempai
Sempai
Posts: 447
Joined: 2002/06/06
Canada
2003/01/05, 09:20 PM
effalunt I think you are a strong person for making the choices that you have made. You are very young with a long time to find mr right. no one has the right to judge others on such things perhaps the girls that think you are a prude are jelious that they did not make the same choices, and thats one thing you cant undo. As for the guys unless things have changed the girls I remember like you were the ones most guys really liked and respected so I say be yourself hold your head up high and if people have to put you down to make themselves feel better than I feel sorry for those people.



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Never be afraid to try something new. Remember the ark was built by amateurs, The Titanic was built by professionals.
dpking44
dpking44
Posts: 470
Joined: 2002/08/07
United States
2003/01/07, 10:49 AM
Bravo effalunt. Unfortunately, some guys make assumptions. I like to think that most gentlemen wouldn't make those assumptions and that is the rule, not the exception. You're morals are sound, don't worry about what other doodoo heads think. lol Obviously one benefit of working out is to look good for out mates, or potential mates. A woman with a nice body should be looked at for someone who cares about her health, looks, and conveyance of confidence, nothing else.

DP
effalunt
effalunt
Posts: 333
Joined: 2002/10/17
Canada
2003/01/07, 12:56 PM
Wow. Thanks to everyone for all the positive feedback. It's funny when someone asks me why I don't drink alcohol and I say because I'm taking care of my body, and also gets the same answer for why I won't sleep around. It's not for religious reasons, or shyness reasons, or any of the usual stuff. I almost got married last year and was living common law at the time. The point is simply that I value myself to much to be intimate with someone I don't trust and respect and vice versa.

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Think you can or think you can't; either way you're right--Goethe
erirvine
erirvine
Posts: 196
Joined: 2002/11/20
United Kingdom
2003/01/14, 06:08 AM
People have different out look on life, personally I would not sleep with anyone I would not consider spending my life with. Again it’s not for religious reasons or that I am a prude I had a wild youth doing more in my 23years so far than many people will ever do. But I survived where as almost all of my old friends are in bum jobs, addicts, in rehab, prison or worse because I tried to think about my life long term. Just looking at the consequences, forget the grief from been told by someone they mean nothing to you when you thought you did (or having to tell the person they were only a one night stand), you face messing up a not only your own life (aids and other STD’s) but potentially having unwanted children and then often unavoidably messing up theirs as well. I know the chances a rare but when the stakes are so high I don’t think it’s worth the risk.