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2005/10/15, 01:41 AM
About 3 months ago I quit smoking. I say "about" because it's been long enough now to forget exactly when. I had smoked for 18 years. I had always hated it growing up. My family would get in the car and the first thing they would do is roll up the windows, crank up the a/c and light up. I promised myself as a kid I would never smoke. That was one of the big promises I made to myself that I broke.
I've gone through alot of changes since then, I stopped sports, I started drinking, dabbled in some other things just short of legal. Pledged a fraternity, dropped out of school, worked, returned to school, graduated( drank liquor from a flask in the audience before I was handed my diploma), quit numerous jobs even while I had a Bachelors, fought depression, got married, had my first daughter, about to have my second, and always getting bigger and bigger.
When I looked in the mirror, I saw someone that wasn't really there. I knew I was overweight, but in my minds eye, I could just suck it in and no one would know. Don't worry about the pants size getting a little bigger every now and then, naw, nothing to worry about.
So my wife had been nagging and nagging me to quit smoking. She would shut up about it every now and then and that was nice. I had tried the patch many times, never had the balls to go cold turkey, I wouldn’t like how I treated others or feel about myself, BS excuse. So I kept smoking.
I landed a new job in the DC area in a new field. Eventually I had to get a new doctor. This doctor put it to me in a way that to this day is shaping all aspects of my life and to a larger degree my family’s. He said "For you to survive, and not drop dead of a heart attack at 50, you have to quit smoking." Survival?? hmm, hadn't considered it that way before, Only 15 years left to life, my girls would be 17 and 15 and would have to deal with their fathers death, not even out of high school.
2 weeks later I quit. 3 days after that I was a grumpy asshole, the next day, I was a former smoker.
I gained weight, Started working out, Gained more weight. Was 5'8" and 240 lbs before it all came together for me, not only did I have to quit smoking, I needed to change every aspect of me, my diet, my personality, my relationships with my family and friends. No more 12 pm mcdonalds lunches everyday with my workmates. No more fried food or pizza just because it's Friday.
Besides I had just took control of the most controlling habit in my life, I saw the opportunity to go ahead and control something else, literally, my existence.
It’s working.
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2005/10/18, 08:20 PM
Thanks Carivan, I was simply telling my story.
My path has changed course. I'm 15 lbs lighter than I was 3 weeks ago and a hell of a lot healthier. When I was a smoker, I found that many times I would either eat or smoke only to satisfy the oral fix I needed. It gets slowly out of control, just slow enough to learn to live with it and accept it.
I'm actually eating waaay more than I used to. Now its just good for me. I'm a pretty good cook so I can dress stuff up to keep it enjoyable.
Just to put it out there, here's how I quit smoking, I used Wellbutrin for 2 weeks, about 1 1/2 weeks into it I noticed I smoked just because it was time to smoke, not necessarily because I wanted one...pretty cool. At 2 weeks I smoked my last one and never picked up another one. Every single time, I had a craving, I would pop in some kind of hard candy..eventually I got sick of them and they were easy to quit.
As for the food change, this site and one called whfoods.com were very instrumental. I haven't faultered in 3 weeks now from the list of foods from that site and I'm assuming that in another week, my eating practices will become a lifestyle habit. At least that's what I've heard about habit forming.
Regardless, thanks for the encouragement. And I do hope this helps others move past their own mental blocks, because unless it's an actual physical problem, it's all in your mind.
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