Mon, Dec 14th 12:35pm

I just now discovered this website. Soon to be downloaded app. It's free and right now. Free is good. I want so badly to do this right. To hold myself accountable. And to give my time, effort, and accountability to actually following through consistently with my work I must put in. Eating properly, sleeping properly, putting away the junk/sweets food, and dedicating myself entirely to my workouts. Making sure I commit and follow through with each one, each time im scheduled to do one. And literally only not completing my workout day. Cause of being truly I'll with a sickness. I want this to be in a way what it used to be in my life. My passion, hobby, pride, dedication, joy, passion, expression, overall my way to direct my emotions, feelings, and pain into something productive, therapeutic, and totally good for my life. I remember the way it felt to build myself up stronger day by day. Feeling confident about how I looked, felt, and lived. I was so driven, focused, and full of passionate energy. I need this in my life more then ever before. I must obtain my true and most decisively important and necessary goal in my life right now. What I have staring me down in the mirror each and every day. It's been there and it hasn't gone away. And only I can beat it. And end it's existence in my life. My addictions have broken me down for too long now! They have taken away the true man I once was. And will be again. But it will take great work, dedication, reselience, focus, sacrifice, courage, strength, intelligence, and the utmost commitment to making this complete and total change to my every day and every way life I lead and live currently. It is not my true way. It is not the way. And it no longer can be the direction and way I travel down. This life must end. And a new one must begin. This program will be one of the most important pieces to the puzzle. Along with going back to impatient soon. Finding a new place and area to live. Getting my life aligned and centered back on God. Getting a job/going back to college. Finding a wife. Having a child/family. Turning a job into obtaining and having a real actual career. These are the true desires and dreams of my life. And this ram is a huge stepping stone for me to get myself alligned and back heading in that pivotal direction. So necessary, critical, pivotal, obtainable, and eventually so rewarding for and in my life! God is good, his love is true and vast. He died for my sins! I am a warrior. A true fighter in every way of the sense. I work hard. I work harder. This will not define me. This will change. I will change it. My story is not over yet. Nothing is complete until it finally is. My journey through this will only make me stronger. Fill me with more desire and dedication. Make me extremely tough and weathered. And truly make my story one worth knowing and ultimately living. This is the start of something so beautiful. I won't give up. I'll never give in. I must never ever ever quit. Here's to the begining of something beautiful. Here's to me taking my life back. And to truly getting to live again. Happy, hopeful, free, passionate, loving, strong, and always walking in the path God sets for me!

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