I am feeling a bit down. I feel lonely and I wish I had more to do in my life. I just need to be patient. My husband has neglected to fix our car for 2 years now and I haven't driven in that long because of that. So a few more weeks we will have two cars.
I feel a bit let down and controlled. He's not that kind of person. I have had control issues my whole life. (My alcoholic mom was physically, emotionally and mentally abusive. ) whenever I drink or eat too much sugar the next day I'm in the dumps.
So I just ate breakfast. I had organic bacon with bulletproof coffee. That's my favorite breakfast. Any way, my daughter will be one in a few weeks and her teething has been bad since three months. I'm a new mom so I didn't know babies could be quiet until her first tooth popped out. Then I had a life of my own for two days. I knew she had been teething, and we tried everything. So it's been really hard for me and I've just been doing my best and Ive never taken It out On her. (I do attached parenting.)He doesn't see how hard it is for me. Because I'm peppy and a go getter and positive majority of the time.
So now that I'm not breastfeeding as often I will get a teeny break from my daughter. I think I need my husband to do more for me but I feel like he already does so much. He is a mechanic. And just recently got a better paying job so now we can afford good quality foods.
My sister was obese and then got on a diet pill. Which pissed me off because she got thin and I'm still a whale. Plus I am competitive. (Never knew that about myself this is recently founded) so I get down when she succeeds. Not sure why that is. We did compete as kids for affection since we got zero from our parents.
Anyway, I wish I had a buddy to chat with about my diet and exercise. I did the gym thing a long time ago and I liked it but now I'm into functional fitness and kettle bells. I also think the gym is no place for a person. There are so many good things about exercising out doors plus I golds gym has stolen money from me over the years it's ridiculous. BUT I may just go back to it. There are plus's to the gym like convenience and day care.
I need a work out buddy And a vehicle.
I miss my old self. I was on HCG and lost 30 pounds in 30 days. I'm so heavy now that if I just did keto I'd be losing at the same rate. So I don't need that stuff. My body is a good working organism. My metabolism isn't screwed as much as I thought it was. But I better take care of it now because in about 2 years I'll be thirty. Any way I needed to talk so I could not binge. Thanks
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